Leavin...On a Jet Plane!

Dios es Bueno

2009-01-29T17:49:00.002-05:00

Wow. It´s been a whirlwind of a week! So much has happened and I feel like there is so much I want to say but I don´t even know where to begin!! Before I left for Masuco, I was having a really hard time. I was having one of those days where I was just done. Ready to go home. Ready to be finished with it all and be in the comfort of my own home. But God showed up and met me where I was at. I gave the devotional for our group on Tuesday and the word that the Lord had given me was ¨My grace is sufficient for you for my power is made perfect in weakness.¨ God was so good. He gave me the refreshment and the power I needed. When I am weak, He is strong and He proved Himself to be faithful. I think a lot of the team were at that place of weakness but praise God, He is strong and has been helping us all along the way!

Well, we made it to Masuco just in time. The roads were pretty rough, and were dirt roads most of the way. It took about 4 1-2 to 5 hours to get there. It started to rain just as we were unloading so it was definitely good we made it when we did. Our hotel rooms were quite small and very interesting. I actually split myself up between two rooms. Originally, I was going to share a twin size bed with one of the team members but another girl on my team had an extra bed so I slept in her room. There were bugs everywhere of course. And it was somewhat funny taking showers at this place because the shower was like 2 inches away from the toilet. There was no toilet seat of course and the water was very cold. Haha. Plus the water didn´t always like to stay in the bathroom. Oh yeah, not to mention, I had some ants visit my bag the second night. I went to get my stuff out and found a couple hundred of them crawling around my bag! They found some crackers that had accidentally opened up and decided to go after them. It was a fun little experience for me! =) Oh did I also mention that at this hotel, they turn the electricity out on everyone at about 11:30 or 12 every night. And then at about 5:30AM, everyone that works at the hotel gets up and starts working and turns on the tv and makes a whole bunch of noise. Needless to say, the nights were short and I did not get a whole lot of sleep but praise God, He´s been giving us all the supernatural energy we need!

Well lets see, what are some highlights and some short stories for you in Masuco. For starters, it was much cooler than in Puerto Maldonado! And we also had some rain!! In Masuco, we had the dental clinics and the medical clinics set up. Then we attempted to do sewing classes. I helped as best as I could with that but there were two problems with me helping. 1. I don´t know how to sew. 2. I don´t know Spanish fluently. It was definitely a stretch and we only had a few people show up but God helped us with that! We had some trouble with the sewing machines too so that made it difficult as well. We VBS for the kids and the services at night with the church. It was great to be there and to encourage the church. It was the first time GO had ever been to this area! What a blessing to be a part of it! The team has been really great too and I have enjoyed getting to know some of the people on the team. They have been an encouragment to me. It´s been so wonderful to see how God has been working through each one of us and bringing all of our stories together and speaking through each person on the team. So I was supposed to give a devotional on Wednesday but didn´t feel ready and wanted a little break. So another guy on our team was asked to do it. He agreed and what he shared was something I definitely needed to hear. He talked about how we need to learn to be in tune with the Spirit. He said when we were in this one town, he had the thought to go ask this kid to kick the soccer ball to him and to play with him. But he was tired and didn´t really want to. He had turned around and just when he decided he would play with the boy, he saw that the ball had gone into the street and had hit someone on a motorcycle and the man on the motorcycle had gone down. No one was hurt and everything was ok but he realized that the Lord had given him an opportunity and he had missed it. And it could have turned out a lot worse.

So Ron just shared about how we need to be in tune with the Spirit and be asking the Lord where He is at and what He is doing and what He wants us to do. I really needed to hear that word because it was just the day before that I had been talking to the Lord about a word He had given me. Someone shared with me that God wanted to show me great things and to expect Him to do great things in my life. So I´ve been sitting here saying, ¨Okay Lord, I´m waiting! What are you going to do?¨And I´v been doing nothing. It hit me like a ton of bricks. Well He´s not gonna do anything cause I´m not actively involving myself. I´m just sitting on the sidelines. I need to be asking the Lord, okay, what do you want me to do! So that´s what I¨ve been doing the past two days and you know, it´s been neat to see Him already work and speak to me!

The other night, I was sitting in church, all nice and comfortable and ready for the events of the night. Then a thought came to my mind. Who´s sharing their testimonies. No one had really said. Then I got the feeling that I was supposed to share. And then I had a feeling that Larry was going to call me up to share. You see, Larry Cochran has this thing with me and my family. Whenever we are on a trip with him, he will ask us any time to get up and share a testimony. We always have to be ready. So I usually just wait for Larry to tell me that I´m going. And well, what do you know. I´m sitting there in the service and he gets up and says I´d now like Michelle Cravens to come up and share a word. Hah! Thanks Larry! It was good though. God was with me and gave me the Lord and it was so awesome to see how my testimony and the testimony of the other woman that shared from our team came together. God knew what He was up to. I´m excited to continue to see Him work in ways like this! =)

Well, I´m finishing up my time with this team. We had to Cusco tomorrow and I get to see Macchu Picchu on Saturday. Then I fly to Lima on Sunday and my parents leave Sunday night. I¨ll be in Lima another 12 days then head to Yurimaguas. I´m starting to get excited and a little nervous about that trip. Apparently we´ll spend two days in Yurimaguas then head up river to another town. It´ll take a day to get there by boat. And I´m thinking conditions are gonna be pretty primitive! I might even be eating some bugs! Haha! I´m excited about the adventure. As much as I hate being uncomfortable and in the hot weather and having to pop a squat over a small hole (maybe that was too much info!), I can honestly say there is a peace and a joy about it all. I love the adventure. And I love the fact that this is where I am supposed to be. That I am in the center of God´s will right now. That´s always the best place to be! =)

I need to get going but please keep me in your prayers as I travel over the next few days. Also pray for my left eye. I think I got an infection in it yesterday and it´s a little irritated. The vision is a little worse in it and the glasses don´t really help to correct it. I´ve got some meds in it but just pray that I won´t have any more problems.

God bless and thanks so much for all your prayers!!

-Michelle

In my weakness, He is strong...

2009-01-25T22:28:00.002-05:00

Hey friends! I feel like it´s been quite a while since I last wrote. So much has happened over the past few days that I feel like I can´t even remember what day it is! The team from my church arrived on Thursday night and Rebeca and I met them at the airport Friday morning. It was so wonderful seeing my parents! Kinda weird being on a team with them though...it´s been about 3 or 4 years since we´ve been on a team together! Haha!

Anyway, our team left and flew to Puerto Maldonado, which is an hour and a half away from Lima by plane (probably two days journey by car). I immediately was overwhelmed by the heat and humidity walking out of the plane. This place is so hot! We had a bus pick us up from the airport and we drove to the hotel we´re staying in. On the drive to the hotel, I noticed there weren´t very many cars...hardly any at all actually. Most people in this town drive around on motorcycles. Sometimes you´ll see two, three, even four people riding on a motorcyle together. Parents will even put their babies on them or small children. Definitely wouldn´t see that back home! Anyway, our first day went well. We rested up some then had dinner and a church service. I had the chance to sing in Spanish with 4 of my friends which was pretty cool! I sang with Sarahí, who is from Mexico, Rebeca, Miriam, and Eunice, who are from Peru and we sang Tu eres Todopoderoso. It was fun! We had a nice long service with a couple different pastors from the area.

Yesterday started our time of ministry. We have a dental clinic, a medical clinic, and reading glasses we have been giving to people. We have also been doing VBS with the children in the afternoon as well as a pastor´s training today. We were at two different churches today and yesterday. I helped out with the clinics and eye glasses. I was a runner and helped to translate wherever it was needed. For the most part, though, I have been helping with the eyeglasses. I can´t tell you what a joy it is to be able to help someone find a pair of glasses. Many of them are elderly people who can´t see well to read their Bibles. It is amazing to see the change in their faces when they put on the glasses and the words are actually clear to them. One woman even brought in her Bible to see if she could read it with the glasses she was trying on. And what´s even more amazing is when they tell you they have been praying for glasses or for some way to be able to read their Bible and we are that answer to prayer with the glasses! Praise God! It brings me so much joy to know that we are able to help people grow closer into a personal relationship with him.

In all the joy, there has been some difficulty too but praise God because He is my strength. Today, the dentist needed latex gloves but someone bought the wrong kind. So the pastor of the church had to leave to get the right ones. I took his job. His job was signing people in...writing down their names, sending them to the right area (medical, dental, or glasses) and trying to keep things under control. Well let me just tell you, there are some days where I feel like my mind is completely open and I understand so much Spanish. That was yesterday for me. Then this afternoon hit. I took the pastor´s job and it´s like I hit a brick wall. I couldn´t understand the people. They were beginning to crowd. I didn´t know what they wanted. And then I had to pronounce names that I had no idea how to pronounce! I was feeling overwhelmed and alone and just wanted to cry. I told the Lord I couldn´t do this. I couldn´t do it. There was no way. Definitley not on my own. Then it happened. A man who was waiting to try on glasses, got up and began to help me. He helped me pronounce the names. Then he wrote down names for me. And then he pretty much just took over the entire thing. I helped send people to the right place and tell him when I was ready but he took over what I could not do. It was so stressful but God stepped in at just the right time and helped me through this man. After he got his glasses, he actually stayed and helped me to the end. Praise God for Him! And praise God for answering my prayer! His power is made perfect in our weakness...when I am weak, He is strong!

Please continue to pray for our team. We have a few people sick. We are also traveling to another town tomorrow which is four hours away called Masuca. They say it is much more primitive than where we are now! So who knows what living conditions will be like! We´ve got a great team who works so hard and has been really positive. Keep praying for them if you would! And pray for the people we´ll be seeing over the next few days! We´ll return back to Puerto Maldonado on Thursday and then leave for Cusco on Friday!

Thanks again for everything. I´ll try to keep you updated when I can! God bless!

-Michelle

Que Chevere!

2009-01-21T12:56:00.003-05:00

So it´s been a week since my last update. I figured it´s time to write again! Ha!! It´s been great this past week. I absolutely LOVE living with Wilma and her family! They are so much fun! I think Wilma and I are a lot a like. We get along so well and are goofy all the time! I try to teach her English and she teaches me Spanish. I´ve been working with her on the song Open the Eyes of My Heart. She is so funny, just listening to her sing the song! She´s really good at it now, compared to the first time she sang it! Ha! She also likes to randomly say English words...like it´s ok...you go, we go, they go, gringo! Haha! I´m telling you, we laugh so much in this house! =)

Well let´s see what have I been up to? I went to the beach on Saturday! AMAZING! Definitely got a sunburn! Sorry to everyone who is stuck in the cold right now...=) The beach was great though. There were five of us that went. We ate ceviche, which is a Peruvian dish. It´s fish with some spices in it. Then we ate some chicharrones...I think it was like squid or something. Not really for sure. It was good though! =) We played in the water and just had a nice and relaxing day! =)

I´m sure you´re wondering what else I´m doing while I´m here. =) I don´t go to the beach all the time, no worries. =) For the most part, I just help Wilma wherever she needs it. We worked on that children´s booklet I think I told you about for like a week. We finally finished it like yesterday...no...wait...two days ago. Ha! Now we´re working on sorting out other materials for children´s books and organizing and all that jazz. It´s been good. I stay fairly busy. But I also spend a lot of time with people, just hanging out, going to the movies, having water fights in the house =), going out for food...oh gosh, Norky´s is my favorite place ever to eat! Haha! This place has GREAT chicken and this other stuff called anticucho, which is cow heart! It is probably my favorite food in Peru, no joke! So good! But seriously, I feel like I´m just going on and on about random stuff now. lol. I´m really so thankful for my time here with Wilma and I wish I had more time here with her. The first team comes tomorrow and we leave Friday for Puerto Maldonado. I´m excited to do the work there but I also wish I could stay longer with Wilma and her family. I feel like I´m finally starting to get connected to people. I think that´s the one thing I dislike about doing all this short term stuff...just when I start to feel like I´m connecting and really settling in, it´s time for me to leave. I´m thankful I get to come back here after my time in Puerto Maldonado but it´s only for about a week. Who knows, maybe God will open up the doors to come back here again...

So many things to pray about. One of my biggest prayers while being here has been about direction. I´m still trying to figure out where God wants me and the specific gifts He has given me. I feel like He´s been showing me more here and there, but I´m still very unsure what the next step is in my life. But is God faithful through it all...even when it seems like He´s not there or He´s not really giving me direction, I know He´s preparing me for what´s next.

I feel like there´s so much I want to say and so much that has gone on that´s it´s just too hard to put in the words. It´s probably because I´m still processing everything. But all that to say, I´m loving my time here in Peru and I´m doing great! Fantastic really. If you could just keep praying for my language learning, that would be much appreciated. =) It´s still a big struggle. But God is good and helping me through!

Anyway, thanks for all your prayers. Please pray as myself and the team from GO InterNational travels by plane to Puerto Maldonado on Friday! Pray that the truth would be proclaimed and that hearts would be open to receiving the truth!! Thanks! God bless!

-Michelle

Muy Delicious

2009-01-14T15:57:00.003-05:00

So maybe you´re wondering from my last blog what the title meant...Michelle La Chiquita Mariposita. Or maybe you´re not but I´m going to tell you anyway. That is Wilma´s name for me. It´s means the little butterfly. =) I was working with her on Monday and she randomly started calling me Chiquita Mariposita. And now, that´s my name. =) I enjoy working with Wilma. She is an incredible woman. Such a hard worker. Has the most beautiful heart. She is kind, loving, giving, humble, patient, a servant. I´m learning more about the person I want to be by just being around her. Her home is always open to anyone and everyone. People say she is the Mother Theresa of Peru. Yep, they´re right! =)

Anyway, things have been good. I have been so busy though. Monday was a little discouraging mainly because of my lack of Spanish knowledge. It´s hard not being able to understand everything that´s going on. But oh well, I guess you just go on and continue praying for more understanding. I´m thankful for my time with Wilma yesterday though. We spent the whole day together and was actually able to understand more and have really good conversation with her! God knew exactly what I needed yesterday. He is so good. =) We went all over the place...up the mountain where her feeding program is (we don´t feed the kids during the week though...just on Saturdays). Then we came back to find we were locked out of her house! Haha, we had a good laugh then decided to head on to Mira Flores, which is in the southern part of Lima, to meet up with the group from Alaska. On our way home, I sat next to this guy who was about 20 years old and had his Bible open to Psalms. I proceeded to tell him I liked the Psalms as well and then we started talking about God and that we were both Christians and sharing our favorite Bible verses and so on. Haha, it was good and also encouraging!

This morning was super busy. We went in to the central part of Lima to buy materials. There are a group of mothers up in the mountains that are learning to make bags. So we had to get materials for them so they could continue making their bags. Their plan is to sell the bags they make and earn some money from it! It´s really incredible and they are so gifted! After we took the materials too the woman (by the way, these trips to the center of Lima and too the mountains take quite a while...it´s a least 20 minutes or more from Wilma´s house to both places so you can imagine we spend a lot of time in taxis and buses)!

Then we came home and fixed lunch together...fish and yuka and tomatoes and rice and fresh orange juice! So good!! Or muy delicious...that´s what Wilma likes to say. I think it´s her favorite word. =) I´m definitely thankful for my time here and enjoying just living the life of a Peruvian. =) Anyway, I need to go. I´m going to help Wilma again with that picture booklet. Lots to get done and definitely not enough hours in the day! Thanks again for all of your prayers. I´ll continue to keep you updated when I can! Love you all!!!

-Michelle, la Chiquita Mariposita =)

Michelle la Chiquita Mariposita

2009-01-12T18:07:00.004-05:00

Hola mis amigos! Saludos y bendiciones en el nombre de Cristo Jesus! =) We´ll I made it to Peru safe and sound. I got in late Saturday night and didn´t have any problems with my flight or customs or anything. Wilma and her son Gerson were there to pick me up. I was immediately overwhelmed with questions about my family, people at GO and all sorts of stuff! I tried to understand as best as I could and fumbled around for answers to their questions. We made it back to Wilma´s house and I was taken to the third floor where I have an entire room to myself. I talked to Wilma for another 10 minutes or so then we said our goodnights and I began to unpack a little. I think being in my room that night and actually being in Peru is when it hit me that I´m here for six weeks. It´s a little overwhelming but I guess you get used to it. Oh funny story....so I go in to the bathroom to get ready before bed and what do you know I have three friends to join me. Yes, las cucarachas decided to hang out in the bathroom at the same time! Haha, darn things! Scared me half to death! Needless to say, I did a quick potty, teeth brushing and face washing and I was out of there! Fortunately, they haven´t been back since but I always look for them when I go in there! =)

Sunday went well. Got up and went to church. There was a team from Alaska there so I actually was not completely immersed in Spanish. Lots of English being spoken. Anyway, after church we ate lunch then I went back with Wilma´s three children. Rebekah is 28, Gerson is 25, and Emily is 23. They are awesome. We came back to the house and just hung out and went for ice cream and attempted conversation. Haha. Fortunately Emily speaks really good English so if I´m stuck, she can help me out! =)

Anyway, last night Rebekah wanted to take me to downtown Lima to Las Aguas. It is this huge park with lots of beautiful fountains. You can actually play in some of them. And at 7:30pm, they have this light show with the fountains and music and everything. It was incredible! So fun! Definitely a great first day in Peru!

Today, went pretty well too. I spent a lot of time with Emily. She is getting ready for a camp so I went with her to the market to get some stuff. Then two of her friends needed to get a bunch of food from the market so we went two more times after that. It was fun just hanging out with them and getting to know them a little better. Once we finished at the market, I ate lunch and started helping Wilma with a huge picture booklet for the children she works with. I´ve been working on that all afternoon and now I´m taking a break. I really don´t know what the rest of the week holds (except for the fact that we´re going to the beach on Thursday and I´m super excited about that! Don´t be too jealous). =) Oh did I mention my arms are a little burned from the sun today and I´m wearing shorts? =) Haha!

Anyway, thanks for all your prayers friends. Please continue to pray for me as I learn the language. I am getting a little frustrated. I feel like I know nothing and I really hate fumbling around for words all the time. But it´s just the first two days. I´m hoping it´ll get better by the time I leave! You know, this woman came up to me in church yesterday and said God wanted to do mighty things in my life and that I need to expect Him to do big things. So I´m trusting and expecting that He will do big things in and through me and I pray that I don´t limit Him to anything. So maybe one of these big things I can expect from God is that He´ll give me complete understanding of the Spanish language. You never know...nothing is impossible for Him. Guess we´ll have to wait and see what happens! I´ll try to update this when I can. I hope all of you are well and I pray blessings on each one of you! Dios te bendiga! =)

-Michelle

Next Stop, Peru!

2009-01-09T09:43:00.003-05:00

It has been quite a while since I have written on this blog. I guess it's time to start again. I'm going to do my best to use this blog as a way to keep people informed with my trip to Peru. Yes, if you hadn't already heard, tomorrow on January the 10th of 2009 at noon, I will be leaving for Lima, Peru for six weeks! I can't believe it's finally here! What will I be doing, you might ask?! I will be traveling down by myself and staying with one of GO InterNational's partners for the first two weeks. She has a feeding program for street children in Lima so I will be helping her out with her ministry. I will also be working on my Spanish speaking skills. My goal is to become even more fluent in the language, so that is why I am doing this total immersion in the culture! =)

After the first two weeks are over, a short term team from my church will be coming. I will help co-lead this team and we will be going to Puerto Maldonado, which is one of the least reached regions with the Gospel in Peru. We'll be doing VBS, passing out eyeglasses, construction, sewing classes and so on. We're definitely going stay busy! I'm super excited about this part of the trip because at the end of my time with this team, we will be going to Macchu Picchu!! This will be my 4th time to Peru and I still have never been. So I'm excited to experience this for the first time!

Once I finish with the team from my church, I will be heading back to Lima for about a week and a half to be with the same lady I was with when I first arrived to Peru. Then, a second team will come and I will help out with them. We will be heading to Yurimaguas, which is in the Amazon region of Peru. We'll be doing a lot of the same things that I did with the previous team. Then, on February 21, I will fly home to KY!

I'm really excited about this opportunity that God has given me to go. I believe it's going to stretch me in more ways than one. For those of you who know me, you probably can imagine that I haven't even started packing yet. That's what today is for. =) Haha. So on that note, I probably need to go. But here are a few things you can be praying for:
-Safety (I'll be traveling by myself so just pray that I have no problems with security or other people and that I also have a safe flight)
-My language skills (I know enough Spanish to get around but I still have lots to learn-please pray that God would open my mind and my mouth and enable me to really understand and speak the language)
-My relationship with Jesus (I just want full dependence on God during this entire trip-just need renewal in my life and want an even deeper relationship with Him)

That's all for now. Thanks so much for your prayers! I will keep you updated when I can!

Dios te bendiga (God bless you)! =)

-Michelle

It's Time for an Update I'd Say....=)

2008-01-16T22:44:00.000-05:00

It's been ages since I've written and I feel like it's time for an update. The last time I had written, I had just seen the musical Wicked. Wanna know something funny? I just saw Wicked last night! Ha!! Crazy how things happen!!

Anyway, I guess a quick summary of my last month in Ireland. Everything went really well. Lots of challenges came my way but God was faithful. I loved getting to know the kids better and working in the cafe. I got to attend a production put on by the kids from the Jez, which was so fun! I got close to a bunch of girls before I left and they were so cute! They'd come in during the lunch hour and look for me and just were so sweet! I was happy to have them come in! They were a bright spot in my day! Oooh, and I can't forget Felipe!! Felipe was this boy who started coming in who made all of us smile! He hadn't heard about the cafe until about a month or so before I left the country. Well, once he found out about he, he absolutely loved it and was in there everyday. Before I left, I got into a conversation with him about God and he said that he believed in God more since he had been coming to the cafe!! Praise God! What an encouragement! That was so fun and he is one of the kids I miss a lot!

It's so hard investing so much in a place then having to say goodbye. I realized the time I spent there wasn't enough to really invest like I wanted to. But I just have to pray that God will take what little bit I did invest and really speak to the kids and change their hearts! I pray each one of them comes to an intimate relationship with Jesus Christ!!

Before I left, I got the chance to take a week holiday in Italy! My friend Taylor lives in Arezzo, which is in Tuscany, and teaches English. It was so fun getting to stay with him for my visit! My old roommate Kira met up with me too! We traveled to places like Cortona (where they filmed the movie Under the Tuscan Sun), Siena, Modena (where Balsamic Vinegar originated), and Rome! I loved it! A week is definitely not enough time to spend in that place! Too many amazing places to see!! I loved the food and the wine was pretty amazing too! Seriously, having great food and wine were probably some of the best memories I had on that trip!! And Taylor taught me to cook a meal called Polenta!! Yes folks, I am actually cooking now!! Who would have thought!! So yeah, Italy was great and words honestly can't describe how incredible it was!

Well, as you can probably figure it out, I am back in the states (back at Taylor in fact). I came back in mid-December and was home for about two weeks before coming back to good 'ole Indiana. It was good to be home and see family and friends again. It was definitely hard though because I have had a lot to process since being home. Once I got home, I was dealing with some culture shock and really missing my friends, not to mention thoughts of certain people who were in my life came back to me as well. I guess the realization of life back home hit me again. I was kind of able to run from it while in Ireland, but now I had to deal with it.

I left to move in to my apartment on Wednesday the 2nd of January. God is so good, I must say. A friend of mine that I did not treat very well last year called me up on my way to Indiana. It was really cold that night and I was going to be in late. (By the way, this girl and I had made a mends and were friends again but I had no idea she was going to call me). Anyway, she told me that whenever I got there that I should call her because she wanted to help me move in. I was shocked that she even offered this to me. I got there, called her, she arrived, we hugged, and it was as if nothing had happened to us in our friendship. We got all my stuff in then I took her to get some coffee. I started talking and began to apologize again for all the things I had done and she told me not to even bring it up, that it wasn't necessary. She said she had already forgiven me and forgotten it. WOW! What an amazing example of Jesus right there....and unconditional love and forgiveness. God has been so good...He has been restoring that friendship and I am so thankful. I am so thankful God has put people like her in my life. If you want to know what true friendship is, this is it. Thank you God for blessing me with a friend like Erin!!!! =)

Like I said before, God is so good and so faithful. He is a God that brings restoration and healing to peoples lives. He also gives us a second chance (and a third, and fourth, and so on..)! I praise God for that. I know I didn't invest in my friends lives last year. I invested in other places and now am reaping the benefits of that. I basically have to start all over but praise God that I still have that opportunity. It's hard though. I am trying to pick up the pieces of the life that I had here and put it back together, without James in it. Being back here has been incredibley hard but I know it's where God wants me. I need to face my problems and struggles head on. I have a lot to work through and still need lots of healing in my life. But praise God, He is patient and faithul and leading me one step at a time. And being back here has made me realize how much I really don't have myself together. I have realized I have a lot of insecurities in my life. Fears of failure and rejection, my own weight issues, caring what other people think about me, etc. I keep asking myself why I am this way. It's bondage and I want freedom. How do I get out of it though? The only way I know is to embrace this junk head on and turn to Jesus. Honestly, I just got this picture in my head of having all these things in my arms (basically junk) just weighing me down. And then I turn to God and he takes them from me. But how does he take them from me? He takes them by me being intentional and spending time with him. By spending time with Him, I get to know His heart and the person that he created (me) and how He delights in me. To be honest, I have realized that my identity is not in Christ. I want it to be but I know it's not. That's what I'm striving for, is knowing and believing that my identity is found in Christ and no one else. The only way I know to do that is to immerse myself in Christ and in His Word. From there, God will completely cover me with who He is and the person I am will be found in Christ. I'm not at that point yet but am striving to be there. Philippians 1:6 says, "being confident of this that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus." Praise God! I know God has started this work in me and it will be finished one day. Whether it takes a few months or the rest of my life, God has promised to complete the work He started in me!! I am so thankful that I have that hope. That means I need to continue to persevere and press into Jesus. By pressing into Jesus, that freedom will come!

Something else that has been encouraging to me is the whole idea of the hard times in life. I have realized that we all need them and they are a season in our lives. BUT, if we persevere in them, God will carry us through and help us. We will grow from our circumstances and know that God has allowed whatever has happened to teach and grow me in my relationship with Him. So the encouraging thing is that God allows these things to make me more like Christ! Woohoo!! How exciting!! It's that whole idea of hope again that even though this circumstance really stinks, I know God is faithful and is making me more like Christ through it. And those hard times just make us cling to God even more! So I just praise God because even though life is hard and is not always great, I can still praise Him because I know He is good and faithful! I just can't stop saying it! God is so good and so faithful!! =)

Well, I think that is all for now. I will try to keep this updated a little bit more often. As the weeks go on, the school will probably get a lot harder for me. But I am excited to say that August of this year, I will be graduating from college!!! Yay!! I decided to go ahead and finish a whole year early! I am very excited and looking forward to what's to come after college!! Okay, well God bless and have a great day!!

Love,
Michelle

Wicked!!

2007-11-02T18:14:00.001-04:00

Okay, I have not dropped off the face of the earth, I promise! I am just in London for the week on holidays and haven't gotten around to writing a blog in a while! So sorry! Just know that I am well and having a great time here!! I saw the musical Wicked last night which was incredible!! I loved it! I've seen Big Ben and lots of other great sights here in London...and been riding the Underground like crazy! Anyway, I was in Dublin earlier in the week and had a great time there too! Got to go back to Greystones, my home from two years ago! It was nice going back but I realized it's not my favorite anymore. I absolutely LOVE Galway now! I think I love it because I have made connections and friendships with people there. I've really made it home. I love it!! But I still love Greystones (especially the fish and chips from the harbor which I had twice the three days I was there!) Oh yeah, random...I got this ginormous bruise on my backside on Monday. I totally slide down the steps of the double decker bus! It hurt real bad and is the biggest bruise I've ever had in my entire life! Kira drew a face on him and we named him Fred! Good times! But yeah, uhm can't think of anything else to write. I should probably get going cause other people probably want to use the internet! But I will try to write another update once I get back to Galway on Monday! Hope all are well! I'll be putting up some pictures once I get back! That's all for now though! Ciao! =)

Your Blood Washes Over Me!

2007-10-20T06:10:00.000-04:00

So I'm sitting here working in the bookstore and it's pretty quiet. A few people came in today, but not many. It's usually very quiet in here. Sometimes it's no fun because everyone is over in the cafe working and together and you are stuck here in the bookstore away from everyone and all the kids. I'm trying to have a good attitude about it and actually, it has been really nice just taking some time out for myself. Today I was able to just have my quiet time in here. And I'm listening to Hillsong as well while I'm having my quiet time so I guess it can't get much better than that!! I keep listening to this one song though and it's really just hitting me and I am just so thankful for what Jesus has done in my life. The chorus goes something like this: "And you saw me, when you took the crown of thorns. And your blood washed over me. And you love me, through the nails that you bore. Your blood washes over me!" Wow! Awesome! I love it! I am so thankful for the grace and mercy God has given me. I've screwed up a lot in my life but the blood that Jesus sacrificed on the cross covered all my sin and all of my faults and mess ups! And the cool thing is that he did see me when he was on the cross. He saw all of us! And he died because he loved us unconditionally and wanted us to experience life to the fullest. No person on earth can ever love me as much as God loves me!! Wow, I know all of this but it's just good to always be reminded of what Jesus has done for us!!

"Thank you Lord for loving me even through my mess ups! And even though I continue to stumble and fall, you pick me back up and keep me going. You have redeemed my life and lead me in the way of fullness of life! I thank you that you give me purpose and meaning to life! I love you Lord!"

Well, things are going really well here. I am making great friends, lasting friendships actually. I am going to be so sad when I have to leave. I am learning so much from everyone here, just growing together. It's incredible what the Lord is teaching me and showing me through everyone here. And as for the kids, it is so awesome just to see them come in and hang out with all of us. You have to wonder what God is doing in their lives, how He is working. Some of them seriously come in all the time just to hang out and chat. Do the words that we say to them ever really get through? Do they see Jesus in our lives? Do they see something different? Are we even being a good example of Jesus to them? Some of them have been asking questions lately about Jesus, but I think they are just more interested in other things. I wish we could save them from hurt and pain. "Taste and see that the Lord is good." Just give Him a shot, you know? I mean, does it hurt anyone to at least give Him a shot? He brings purpose and meaning to life. He loves unconditionally. The road might not always be easy but He promises to never leave us or forsake us. He will be our strength and carry us through. How do you tell that to people? How do you show them Jesus? I know that the most important thing for me to do is to spend time with Jesus. Intimacy with Him. To know God better and draw near to Him. I guess after that God will just do the rest. I need to just be close to Him and hopefully by having that closeness to God, others will see and want to experience that as well. I have such a hard time though, spending time with Jesus. And you think it'd be easy because of all the things He's done for me, but let's face it, I get distracted so easy. It makes me sick sometimes too. I could be spending quality time with God and I am wasting my life away on facebook tagging pictures and checking out what other people wrote on my friend's walls. I can easily spend 4 or 5 hours on the internet and after I am done, feel like I haven't accomplished anything. After I get done with work, I am always so tired and sometimes the last place I want to go to is the Bible. I think that I can relax and just get on the internet for a little while. Then I end up spending an eternity on there and by the time I'm done, I am too tired to read and spend good time with Jesus. It's aweful but unfortunately, it's a pattern I've gotten myself in to. I don't manage my time well, even when it comes to homework. I am such a procrastinator and I need to work on that really bad. I need more discipline in my life. I don't know how I'm going to do it but I think it is something I have been convicted of lately. How am I spending my time and how am I doing good for the Kingdom of God? Well, I think I need to spend less time on the computer, that's just it. I think I'm going to have to limit myself to a certain amount of time on there. Seriously, it's like an addiction. And I need to get to bed earlier and make sure to set aside time either in the morning or at night to spend time with the Lord. I guess if anyone thinks about it, please pray for me. I know it's going to be hard (already is) and Satan is going to try to distract me every way possible. Pray for strength to keep my eyes on the Lord and to use my time wisely.

Well, I think that's about it for now. It's almost 1pm now and hopefully within the next hour or so I will get to eat lunch! (I am hungry!) Ooh, a customer just came in!! Well, I better go in case she needs any help! Thanks for your prayers and I pray a blessing over each person that reads this and that God will give you a refreshing of His love today!! Until next time, cheers!!

-Meeshie Moo =) (one of my many nicknames here, haha!)

Encouraged

2007-10-13T20:49:00.000-04:00

I know I just wrote a blog only a few short days ago but I really felt like writing another one!! And hopefully this one will be significantly shorter than all the other ones I've written!! Haha!!

Well, I just am excited about this week. It's just been a good week. I mean yeah, crap has happened, but over all, I have felt really encouraged this week. Do you ever feel like when you first start working somewhere new that you just don't seem to be getting everything or are still really far behind? Or you question if you've really picked up anything at all since you've first arrived there? Well, that's sorta how I've felt for a while. I am definitely one of those people who likes to be perfect at something the first time I do it. Well, I think God is trying to teach me that I won't always get it right the first time and that's okay. You've got to learn and make mistakes. It doesn't mean I'm incapable, I just have to learn, practice, and be patient. I just have noticed that I get real self-conscious, always worrying what other people are going to think or if they'll laugh at me or think differently of me if I don't do it right or screw up something. Well, I'm trying to work through that. I don't want to be like that. I want to have confidence in what I do, no matter what it is and confidence that even if I do mess up, it's okay and I don't have to worry what everyone else thinks. I'm just trying to remember that my confidence comes from Christ and that I find my worth completely in Him.

Well anyway, kind of to go along with all of that, I was put on dishes on Thursday. Dishes are probably the worst and most depressing job ever and Tommy put me on dishes all by myself. Now, you must understand, most of the time at work Sarah, CJ, and myself are always put with someone else. We always help other people their jobs and never really do a station on our own. Well anyway, I got put on dishes with no help. It was okay though because I really got the full experience of what it would be like to actually be an intern and work here like the interns and staff do every day. Well, the dishes actually went well and I had a little bit of help toward the end of the day from Maren but for the most part, I did the dishes all by myself and cleaned my area and everything. And when I was finished, I felt so accomplished and so good about myself. I worked hard that day. I worked my butt off. And I finished the task!!! It was such an incredible feeling!!! I know it doesn't sound like much to you but to me, it was kind of the encouragment I needed. It felt like I was actually capable of doing something by myself, like I had made progress here!!!

And then today happened. Saturday is usually a lighter day and Mike's daughters Christina and Luccia came and helped. They are so eager to learn and help and get in on the action (they are 13 and 14 years old). So anyway, Luccia followed me around for the morning and I worked behind the counter a little bit. She started asking me questions: "How do you use the till? What numbers do you press? How do you do this? How do you do that?" It was brilliant because I actually knew what to tell her, how to show her what to do!! It's one of those things that you don't realize how much you know or how far you've come until someone new comes. Then you see how far you really have come!! I was able to explain a bunch of things to Luccia and even make her lunch for her (which, she said tasted very good!!) But anyway, it just made me so happy and so encouraged. I don't feel like I have to answer as much questions anymore. It's starting to make sense now!! Praise God!! I think it's the encouragment I needed!!!

On a completely different note, last night we had a small group celebration thingy. The whole church ended up being there because it was actually a welcome home party for a couple that had just gotten married. But it was so fun to be with the church and the college age people. We are all starting to connect really well! It's so neat forming friendships with people from Malaysia, Ireland, Brazil, Spain, and wherever else we're all from!! Such a diverse group but one thing we all have in common and that is a love for Jesus Christ!! I think that's one of the things that I appreciate most about being here and working at An Tobar Nua. All the people here really do love Jesus and we're all trying to grow together and encourage one another along in our walks with the Lord. I am so thankful for them and the fact that we all get to journey along together!!

I do have a prayer request if you all could be praying. I am really praying about some big things right now that I can't share about just yet. It would be a big change in my life but if it's what the Lord wants then I want to follow His will. But please just pray that the Lord would open wide the doors and really make it known to me what He wants me to do. Pray that the Lord would also give my parents wisdom in the situation and that He would speak to them about the situation. Pray that God would just make His way known to me for this next phase in my life. I am sure within the next month or so I will be able to share more in detail what is going on but for the time being, please just pray for clarity from God. I'd really appreciate it so much!!

Well, it's super late here and I have church in the morning! Then I'm off to do some grocery shopping and chatting and drinking chai lattes with a friend! God bless!!!

-Meeshie =)

Cork, Turning 21, Clifden, and Divine Appointments =)

2007-10-10T14:45:00.000-04:00

Oh my word I am so behind in my blogs! And I am sure you all are interested as to what's going on! Ah, so much has happened in the past couple of weeks and I will try to give you the condensed version (but beware, it will probably still be really long!!)

Okay so let's see, last time I wrote, I was basically having a super hard time and really just feeling attacked. But God really helped me make it through. He knew what I needed and that was a day off! So praise God, last Saturday (the 29th) I had a day off from work and decided to go to Cork with my friend Paul from work. It was such a refreshing day! We basically left all our worries and all the crap from Galway and from work in Galway and just enjoyed the day worry free! Paul is a great friend too. We basically just talked straight for the whole day and walked around the city of Cork. It was about a four hour bus ride there and back (so 8 hours total on the bus!) and then just hanging out in the city for the day. We had a lot of funny moments and it was good just having deep conversation with him about God and life and whatever else! So yeah, thank the Lord for a day to just relax and get away!!

Oh yeah, I forgot to say, the night before we had a small group with people from church. It was a lot of fun. Such a mix of people too...we have people from America, Ireland, Malaysia, Spain, and I think probably some other places! It's so great getting us together! We even played a couple of game of Mafia together, which was awesome. It was fun just getting to know people.

Well, Tuesday finally hit and I turned 21!!! Woohoo!! I'm 21 now! I can't believe it! It was a good day, not really eventful or anything. I worked and then had class and yeah just nothing real big. Tonight, though, Tommy and Megan decided that they wanted to throw me a little party and bake me a cake. So we're gonna celebrate my birthday next Wednesday!! Woohoo! Fun stuff! It's so weird though, thinking about my birtday...I really am growing up. Time has flown by and before I know it, another 21 years will go by. Who knows where I'll be or what I'll be doing, if I'll be married and have kids or what. Craziness!!! =)

Okay so then the next day, a cool thing happened. I was in the bookstore during Aine's lunch break and this man came in. I asked him if he needed any help and basically he just started opening up and talked about how he was interested in Christianity and was just seeking. What an awesome opportunity God had laid before me!! He started asking questions and I tried to help him out the best I could, trying to share from my own life and belief in Jesus Christ. Then Mike popped in to my head. Mike works with the ministry and is really gifted in talking to people, especially like this. So I asked the man if I could phone Mike and the man was like, "Well, I normally would say no to something like this but today I'm going to say yes." I was so excited! So Mike came downstairs and talked to this man in the coffee shop for a while. Then, I was in the book store later and he came in and thanked me. I told him I'd be praying for him and see him at church (he actually went to the church where I go but we hadn't met yet). It was so neat just to be a part of it! I think he's just really seeking and wants to know that God really is for real. So yeah, God is good!!!

Okay so then that night I got to see my roommate Kira!! She is in Ireland for the semester as well helping with the Irish freshman who are in Greystones. It was so refreshing just to be with one of my closest friends and talk about what God was doing in our lives! It was fun meeting the freshman too and thinking back to when I was in their position! Good times! Then the next day the big group came to the cafe! That was probably one of the craziest days of my entire life! It was so busy! It was non-stop for the entire morning and probably up until 2pm that day (which is not so normal for us). It was neat though getting to see the big group. We got a chance to share with them about our experience here. I think some of them were actually interested in it. It was cool though cause that day that they came, I really began feeling like I am getting connected with the kids and can interact with them. I don't feel as much like the new person anymore (which is so exciting!) =) Oh yeah, then that night we went to Da Roberta's which was incredible!! It's the best Italian restaurant ever! I stuffed my face! Haha! It was worth it though! I'll have to eat there one more time before I leave here.

Okay so anyway, we unexpectedly got to go on staff retreat this past weekend!! It was so much fun! We drove to Clifden, which was about an hour or so away. We got this big house with a bunch of rooms in it. It was tons of fun. I stayed up till 4:30 the first night talking with Leanna and Paul, actually about deep stuff! Haha! And Paul and I decided to make Skittle Juice to have a sugar high. It consisted of skittles, coke, and red bull. Good times!! I roomed with Megan which was tons of fun!! She is an amazing woman! It was such a good weekend cause I really feel like I got to know people better, especially my Irish friends like Megan, Tommy, and Paul. They are incredible people and it's so hard to think about leaving them in December (and even leaving Galway and the ministry). I really do love it a lot here. I have definitely been blessed this semester by different people in my life. Oh yeah, something else during the weekend. Well, on Saturday Leanna and I decided to hike Sky Road. We found this castle and just took some time out by ourselves. Well, this girl saw me from a distance and we started talking. I found out she had come from Australia to Ireland and was looking for work and might be in the Galway area. Well anyway, we just started talking and I told her all about the ministry and the cafe at An Tobar Nua and just tried to share with her some of my heart and it was just an awesome opportunity. She seemed so intersted and I have her the info as to where we were located and told her to come on by whenever she came back to Galway. She said she'd definitely stop in the shop and I even told her about small group. It was just another awesome opportunity God gave me and I have been praying for her as well and hope that a seed was just planted in her life and that others will come along the way and just help her grow even more!!

So yeah, life is pretty good. I am definitely tired though. Work is exhausting. By the time I get done, I pretty much don't want to do anything. I did take a walk on the Prom last night which was good. The weather is still nice enough that I can walk outside and not get too cold. The weather here is so crazy. Just the other morning, it was all rainy and nasty. Then, the next thing you know, by the end of the day, it was all sunny and beautiful and you wouldn't have even thought that it was so bad earlier in the day. Like they say, the weather in Ireland is predictably unpredictable!!

If you all could, please keep me in your prayers. I have a lot of things going on at the moment that I am praying about. I am just trying to seek direction for my life and where God wants me. I will share more in detail later but just pray that God would give me a clear answer for what He wants me to do with my life. Please continue to pray for roommate situations. I've been having difficulties since the start of the trip but I know God is faithful and will help me through. Just pray for continued strength and a Christ-like attitude.

Well, I think that might be it for now. Thanks for your prayers and anyone ever has any specific questions about anything here, please ask!! Or if you want to know how something is done or whatever, please ask! I'd love to hear how everyone back home (or wherever you're at) is doing!!! God bless you all!!

-Michelle

Just an encouraging verse we read during our staff prayer time today..."But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light. Once you were not a poeple, but now you are the people of God; once you had not received mercy, but now you have received mercy." - 1 Peter 2:9-10

"Father, I praise you for saving my life and showing me mercy. I thank you that I am your child and I belong to you. Father, I pray for all the people that I love and are dear and special to me to experience the fullness of you and your love for them. I pray that all would taste and see that you are good! Thank you for rescuing me out of darkness and bringing me into your light! You are amazing God!! I will declare your praises forever Lord! You are my rock and my shield and my place of refuge! I love you Jesus!!"

Lord, Be My Strength...

2007-09-26T20:27:00.000-04:00

Some quotes a dear friend of mine sent to me that have been super encouraging to me:

"All things are sent and governed by God, and however troublesome they are, they will, if accepted gladly, lead us surely and quickly toward holiness."
-Jean-Pierre de Caussade

"It is not the splendor or the greatness of our deeds that matters. The smallest, most trivial task we accomplish is supremely important if it is done in obedience to God's will and for love of Him." -St. Therese

Wow, so many things going through my head right now. So much has happened since I last wrote. It's been a difficult week. I am really beginning to understand how hard and draining ministry and being a missionary really is. I am seeing how important it is to be in communion with Jesus everyday. I am seeing how much I need him in my life everyday. I go and work everyday and sometimes wonder if it's doing any good. I work in the kitchen, I clean bathrooms, I serve food to people and wonder if what I am doing is really ministry. It is even though it doesn't always feel like it. It can be draining though. And when I am drained and have poured so much out into other people, I realize that I need Jesus so much. And also, during my ministry, I realize how much I need him and need him to guide me and give me the words to say to people. It's just so tough and for any of you that are reading this and have been missionaries, I really am understanding you. Missions trips are great to go on and I highly encourage people to go on one, but you really don't get the full effect of missions and ministry until you live it out day to day for a longer period of time (more than 2 weeks). It is hard. It is discouraging. But like my dear friend Leanna said, I have hope. There is a bigger picture that I can't see but God can see. And I have hope in knowing that He is in control an'd He knows what He's doing and is using these experiences right now to not only shape me but who knows, maybe even plant seeds in other peoples lives that I might not ever see. I just have to keep my focus on Jesus and know that He sees the big picture and is in control.

Not only am I feeling that but the Lord really spoke to me about compassion today. We were having staff prayer time and we read a verse from the Bible and pray together. Well, this was our verse:

"Jesus stopped and called them. 'What do you want me to do for you?' he asked. 'Lord,' they answered, 'we want our sight.' Jesus had compassion on them and touched their eyes. Immediately they received their sight and followed him." -Matthew 20:32-34

The part that really stuck out to me was that Jesus had compassion. I thought to myself during prayer time that "Hey! I really am a compassionate person! I am compassionate about my friends and family and people I love. I am compassionate about people who are less fortunate, like the children of Africa." But then it's like God hit me in the head and was like "Are you really compassionate? What about the people you don't like? What about your enemies? Would you do anything for them? Would you serve them and love them like I've called you to do?" Then I kinda got humbled real fast and realized that I really wasn't as compassionate as I thought. It's so easy for me to have compassion for those I love, for my friends. But when it comes to people I don't like, I could care less. It's like why should I love them, show them compassion? I can't get along with them, don't really care for them, so why so compassion and love for them? But calls us to something different than that. He calls us to love our enemies and pray for those who persecute you. I was asking myself why I can't have compassion for those I don't like and I realized that it's because of pride in my life. Whoa gosh, I just need to be humbled. It's just interesting how God has been showing revealing things to me in my life.

And not only that but I just feel like Satan has been attacking on all sides. I'm exhausted from work and lack of sleep, there have been roommate issues, and just all sorts of things. Tonight I had a breakdown. I just cried. I just feel like giving up, but I know I must press on. I have to continue to remember that hope I have in Jesus. And I have to remember that He is always there and never lets go. Leanna sent me the lyrics to this song which are really encouraging.

Matt Redman - You Never Let GoFrom the album Passion 06: Everything Glorious
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death
Your perfect love is casting out fear
And even when I'm caught in the middle of the storms of this life
I won't turn back
I know You are near
And I will fear no evil
For my God is with me
And if my God is with me
Whom then shall I fear?
Whom then shall I fear?

Chorus:
Oh no, You never let go
Through the calm and through the storm
Oh no, You never let go
In every high and every low
Oh no, You never let go
Lord, You never let go of me

And I can see a light that is coming for the heart that holds on
A glorious light beyond all compare
And there will be an end to these troubles
But until that day comes
We'll live to know
You here on the earth

Chorus:

Yes, I can see a light that is coming for the heart that holds on
And there will be an end to these troubles
But until that day comes
Still I will praise You, still I will praise You

"Lord Jesus, I praise you because you truly do not let us go. You are always there. You hold me by my right hand. And even though I am going through storms right now, I still praise you. I praise you because you are God, you are in control, and you are so faithful. I praise you because you are refining me through this and shaping me into what you want me to be. I praise you simply because you are GREAT. Lord, I love you. Give me your strength. I can not do it on my own and I won't do it without you. 'My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.' -Psalm 73:28 Lord, though my heart fails and my own strength fails, you are my strength. I lean on you. Thank you for being there, always and forever. I trust in you Lord. I love you Jesus. Be the center of my life. Help me to keep my eyes on you."

-Michelle

A Day Off...=)

2007-09-17T11:48:00.000-04:00

Mondays are my days off. It's great! I get to sleep in as late as I want and do whatever my little heart desires. However, I am finding that it is really the only day to ever get anything, like doing laundry and getting groceries. So I have come to realize that Mondays for me really aren't a day off at all. And maybe this is just me becoming more of an adult and taking on more responsibilities. It's like I'm looking for time to do things and it's not there like it used to be. Finding time to rest is a lot harder these days. Oh well, please don't think I'm complaining, I guess I am just realizing that I'm growing up! Ha! =)

Well, lets see here, what has gone on since I last talked to you. Not too much. Saturday was super slow for most of the afternoon. Not many people came in. Then around 3:30 or 4:00, a bunch of the kids that come in during the week came in to hang out. Oh my word, there were messes everywhere. It was super frustrating but through it I think I learned and gained a little more respect for the people in other places that do just the same thing that I have been doing for only two weeks. So thanks to all the waiters and waitresses, to all the people who have to wait on other people with food and many different things. It can be a hectic job but thanks for your hard work!

Anyway, we were packed around 4:00 and 4:30 on Saturday. It was a madhouse but we mad it! I worked on the floor and took orders from people and delivered food. Things are getting easier for me as the days go on, but I am still learning. We work really hard here too. Got to make sure everything is super clean for the next day. No joke, all this past week, I have seriously been on dishes so much! It's okay to do, not my favorite, but it's just been funny that I've gotten stuck with dishes multiple times this past week.

So Saturday, enough of the work part, maybe on to some more interesting stuff, I was talking to some kids. They came in and had been hanging in the shop most of the day and one of the kids comes up to me and asks me why I go to church. Now, I must explain that when I am put on the spot like that, I have a super hard time responding, but I tried my best and asked the Lord for help. I told him I go to church because it is a good time to fellowship and be with other people who have the same beliefs that I do. I told him that it is encouraging to me and my life to go there. And I told him that it gave me the opportunity to learn more about God. Of course, he didn't seem to think those were any valid reasons to go to church, especially when sex and alcohol seems to be more of a fun thing to do (not that those things are bad in the right conext like in marriage and then moderation of alcohol, but when out of context they can be a problem). Then something came up about going to a Catholic church and I said that I had never gone before but I am planning on it and want to. Then the boy basically told me that I lost all credibility because I don't go to a Catholic church and that he would never step foot into a "proddy" (Protestant) church. Wow, I was taken back a bit by this conversation. I didn't mean for him to think that I wanted him to go to a Protestant church. You have to understand that religion plays a huge part in Irish culture, especially between Catholics and Protestants. There are many hard feelings against the Protestant church and many people nowadays will have nothing to do with them. The thing that I love about working at An Tobar Nua is that we are not trying to force anyone to become Catholic or Protestant. We simply just desire for people to know Jesus Christ as Lord and for Him to become a part of their lives. I wish I could have conveyed that to this boy that I spoke to (and who knows maybe I did or maybe I didn't). I want him and all the others to know Christ like I am beginning to know Him. "Taste and see that the Lord is good." -Psalms 34:8a He is so good and I want so badly to bridge the gap and for him to see the Lord's goodness. It is not about him going to one church or another. It is about a life full of so much more, full of meaning and purpose. Full of unconditional love! I know deep down he and all the other kids want that, but they just don't know it yet. It can be discouraging and hard but I know God is in control and any little bit that is shared is a seed. I just need to pray for God's to become even more real to him in his life.

So after my long day on Saturday, it was finally the weekend! Yesterday I went to church at Discovery where the pastor talked about marriage. I sat next to my friend Leanna who also went to Taylor and we both had a Christian Marriage class this past semester. We kept looking at each other and smiling, thinking that we were there all over again. Haha! Then, after church, a bunch of us went for Indian food. It was really good but we were there for like 3 hours! Oh my word it was crazy! We had a fun time and it was good getting to know new people. CJ and I were the only Americans that went and it was fun just hanging out with the Irish! They are so funny!

After lunch I came back and just laid around all day. I put my Colts jersey on around 6pm because the game was starting. Yes people, it is Colts season and I am not in the states to watch it. It is so sad and discouraging. However, I do have nfl.com which allows me to watch lines on the screen and gives me a description of the plays just after they 've happened. It can be discouraging though to sit in front of your computer for 4 hours just watching these lines but at least I know what's going on! I do miss watching Manning and Harrison and the rest of the gang! Oh well, they won last night and are 2-0!! Woohoo!! Leanna and I celebrated with a little photo shoot in our jerseys. It was good craic. Every week, after every game, we are planning on taking pictures in our jerseys. So stayed tuned for what's to come next! GO COLTS!

Well, I think that's about it for now. I have probably bored you all long enough again...=) Please continue to pray for strength and energy. Please pray for roommate situations and for unity. Please pray for the ministry that more youth would come in and for sales to increase in the shop. Please pray for God's presence to be felt when people walk into this place and that they would feel it as a safe place. And praise God for His goodness and faithfulness in the good and bad times. He is incredible and is our strength through everything. He never leaves us! So praise Him because He is good!! I love you all and will catch ya later!

Cheers!

-Michelle

Finally a new update!

2007-09-13T17:38:00.000-04:00

Okay so I figured it's about time to update you all! First things first: Here are 10 things you need to know about living in Ireland.

1. They don't say excuse me, they say sorry. Excuse me can actually be negative and in fact, rude at times to use. (That's the big one I'm trying to work on cause I say excuse me all the time!)
2. They don't say twelve thirty or five thirty, they say half twelve or half five instead.
3. You don't leave a tip when you're done eating. Kinda nice compared to the states!
4. Shops around here close super early, like 5 or 6 early. Even the malls will close around those times. But you can be assured that those pubs will stay open really late!
5. They call a cell phone a mobile and text each other WAY more than we do in the states.
6. People usually walk everywhere to go places. Yeah, people have cars, but it's just more convenient to walk.
7. When greeting, they sometimes say "hiya" and when saying thanks or just saying goodbye, they'll say "thanks a million."
8. I heard this one today. The Irish can usually tell who the Americans are. They are the ones who walk through town making eye contact and keeping their heads up when they walk. Many of the Irish keep their heads down when they walk (not all the way down but they can usually spot Americans). =)
9. The cash register is called a till.
And last but not least...
10. They call a movie a film and they call the movie theater a cinema.

Okay so those were really random but they are some things I am getting used to while living here! I know there are so many things that are different than America but I just can't think of them all...oh wait, here's one (and this is so sad): they don't put pickles on sandwiches and hamburgers. That makes me very sad cause I love pickles (however, there is a Subway right across the street from me so I guess if I'm really missing them I can get them there!)

Well, I am sure you all are wondering what I've been up to for the past week! Where to begin, where to begin. Let's see, last week we started working in the coffee shop. Oh my, can we say overwhelming. First off, I must explain that our busiest time of the day is between the hours of 1 and 2. This is when the kids get off for their lunch break. The schools are very different here and they allow the kids an hour for lunch but don't provide lunches like they do in the states. So An Tobar Nua appeals to the kids because they have great and cheap prices for good food. So a lot of the kids will come in and eat.

There are a couple of different stations you can work at during the lunch hour. You have the front where the till (cash register) is and where orders are taken. Then you have the people in the kitchen making the food, and then you have people out on the floor who deliver the food to the kids. When the kids make their order, we put their names on the slip of paper then when the food comes out we can take it to them. Well, for our first day of work, we were put on the floor, in the thick of things (right where all the action was). Oh my word, it was so intimidating and hard. The kids were messing with us saying that the food in our hands was theirs but they were really just lying to us. I even ended up giving one of the plates of food to some girl that it didn't even belong to. It was so frustrating cause I didn't know any of the kids! Oh well, the other staff said that usually happens. Anyway, I made it through that day and I was so happy!

Last week, I spent of lot of time working in the bookstore as well. I took over for Deirdra, the woman who works there full time. It's nice and quiet in there, which is great to have sometimes. They wanted one of us to be the person that knows how to do pretty much everything in there so that ended up being me. I had expressed a lot of interest in wanting to work there so that's why. It's cool cause it's really personal working in there (however, the coffee shop is really personal too)! It's fun being able to help people find a CD or book or talk about a certain book in the shop. Good times! =)

So yeah, back to the coffee shop. There is so much work that goes in to running that place everyday. They clean so thoroughly in there. Oh my word! Mr. Muscle becomes your best friend (ha, that's the stuff we use to clean with)! And there are so many small things to learn...don't do this, don't do that...remember to say this, remember to say that...the list goes on and on! Very overwhelming but just today, I was starting to feel like things were finally clicking. I still feel new but not as new as I did. Today, I worked in the kitchen for the first time. I helped get the meals ready and was trying to learn as best as I could how to put the sandwiches together and cook things and this and that! It actually doesn't seem bad but I just gotta remember the little details of things. And oh my word, the only downside about working here is that there always seems to be little sweet treats floating around everywhere...someone's got cookie dough left in a bowl that we can have...this cookie is broken, go ahead and eat it...this brownie is falling apart, eat it, etc. Ah! It's so good but I just hope I don't go on sugar overload! Ha!

So I'm sure you're probably wondering if I'm even getting an education while I'm over here. The answer is yes. We just started class this week. (I know! Already mid-September and we're just starting class! Ha!) We are taking two missions classes with Arden Autry plus a living cross culturally course. I am also taking Celtic Christianity and Hill Climbing on Blackboard (online) and then I am doing my Psychology practicum. My practicum is working in the coffee shop (working with the ministry). So I am definitely staying busy with work and school (but still having fun too!) The people here are great! I work with an amazing staff. There are 4 other interns that are here working for a year. They are Leanna, Cat, Scott, and Maren. They are great, such a pleasure to work with! Then we have our Irish friends who work here and they are Megan, Donna, Paul, and Tommy. They are all hilarious, full of great craic! (By the way, craic, or crack as we pronounce it, is actually another word for fun, not actually the other stuff...and you know what I'm talking about). =) Then we have Susan and Kelly, the founders of the mission, and Mike, Deirdra, Anie, and I think there is someone else but I forgot her name! Ah! Anyway, they are all incredible! Such a blessing and a pleasure to work with! So welcoming here! And the youth coming in to the shop have been the same way. Even though I have had some trouble with the kids giving me a hard time cause I'm new, they really have been so wonderful and I really have been connecting with them. Some kids come in and hang out all the time, like Conor and Aine, Heather and Mel, just to name a few! It's great just hanging out and talking with them, getting to know them better and what's going on in their lives. Oh and last week, I totally became friends with two Italians and a Spaniard that were studying in Galway. It was so random too cause I was brining them what I thought to be an americano but instead it was an espresso. I said somethin about it being americano and the man was like "Oh no, it's not americano, those Americans, they only copy us." I realy didn't understand what he said but when I came back from getting him some sugar, I introduced myself. He asked where I was from and I said the states. Then he apologized because he said he made a mean comment to me and he was sorry about it. Of course I said no worries and that was the begining of our friendship! They called me back there later cause they wanted a picture with me! So fun! And the two women with this man even wanted to buy a t-shirt from our store which was cool cause most people aren't really interested in buying them! They came back the next day and I got the chance to talk with them some more which was incredible! They tried to teach me some Italian and we just laughed about things. It was a great conversation though and such a neat opportunity to have!

Okay, so hopefully this is it because I feel like I have just overwhelmed anyone who reads this! If you are still with me, wow, you are a trooper!! =) Thanks! Okay so here is a typical day for me. The coffee shop is open Tuesdays-Saturdays from 10:30-5:00. The staff gets together at 9:00 for devotions, prayer, or worship, depending on the day. Then, we finish and get ready for the day. I usually eat around 2, once it's slowed down a lot from the school rush. Then, if it's a Tuesday, Wednesday, or Friday, I go to class from about 3-5. If I don't have class, I continue working of course and usually don't get out till about 6 or 6:30. Then, in the evenings, I sometimes go out for a walk on the Promenod, which is a beautiful walk that takes you out by the Galway Bay. If it's not raining, it is a gorgeous walk! Very peaceful. I usually eat around 8 or 9 and then, if I can get the internet, try to get on that when I can. Sometimes I have movie nights with the girls, which is fun too and sometimes we like to walk in to town before the stores close if we can (like Thursdays and Fridays, the shops stay open later and that's what we ended up doing tonight after work).

Okay so I think that's enough info for now. As for me, I am okay. I have definitely been struggling a lot since I've been here but I am trying to rely on God as my strength. It's definitely hard living with people that you didn't know beforehand and trying to make it work. I am just praying for God's strength and wisdom through it all. He had definitely been faithful but it still doesn't make it any easier. Through it all, I am learning a lot about myself and areas of my life that I really need to grow and change (like pride especially). So yeah, God has a reason and purpose for everything and I have a choice to continue to move forward and let Him change me and grow me.

Thanks for all of your prayers and love. Please continue to pray for me. I am still getting over a sore throat that I had earlier this week. (plus I had flu like symptoms but they are gone now, praise God!) Pray for unity among me and my roommates and for God to really grip hold of our hearts and continue to just give us a thirst for Him and to be with Him. Pray for divine moments with people that walk in the coffee shop and that God will give me His words and not my own when speaking with people. Again, thanks for keeping me in prayer! I love you all so much! And please, PLEASE let me know how you all are! You can now leave comments on my blog page (no worries, you don't have to sign up for anything) or if you'd rather send an email then please do that! And keep checking my pictures page! Hopefully I can continue updating them often!

Well, thanks a million all! Catch ya later! Cheers!

-Michelle =)

The Cliffs of Moher and so much more...(I know, that was pretty terrible!) =)

2007-09-05T15:36:00.000-04:00

Hey ya'll (yes, I've still got a little of that Southern twang in me even though practically every time that I am about to speak a sentence I think about it in my head and it goes through this Irish filter that says my words in Irish. Here's the sad thing though, when I say it in my head, it sounds perfect and great, but when it comes out of my mouth, it doesn't sound right at all! Haha!) Anyway, enough of that! I hope you all are well! I am doing pretty good, just adjusting to life here! Sunday we got to go to church to a place called Discovery Church. It was a good service but I was still super jet-lagged from the flight. Then we went to lunch in town (Galway) with our new friend Maren. Maren is in her second year as an intern here and is a graduate of Asbury College. She was so great. She took us around town to the places we needed to go and helped us out in many ways. Then later that evening, we went to some of the interns house in Salt Hill (a part of Galway about a mile away from the coffee shop) and watched The Princess Bride and ordered pizza. It was really nice because it gave us a chance to not only get out of our rooms but get to know other people, especially people that we will be working with every day. It was definitely overwhelming but good because it made me feel a little bit more settled.

So anyway, one of the friends of the interns, John, is Irish and is going to be leaving this Friday to work in the states. So Maren and this other intern Scott (he's 19 and an intern from Texas) wanted to go to the cliffs for the day with John. Now the cliffs they are referring to are the Cliffs of Moher. For those of you who have seen the Princess Bride, they are the Cliffs of Insanity! Inconceivable! Haha! Anyway, Maren asked us if we wanted to go along! Why would you turn down an offer like that!! So we went and it was the perfect day! The sun was out (which doesn't happen that often here) and the weather was just perfect. (sorry Mom and Dad...the time we went it was rainy, cloudy, and cold...better luck next time?!) =) If you check on my dropshots page, I uploaded a video and some pictures from the day. Plus I loaded a few pictures of Galway and the coffee shop. Hopefully I can get some more up soon. Anyway, the day was incredible at the cliffs! CJ found out that they are 702 feet high! We ended up hiking around the cliffs. (a little scary at times but amazing!) So that was Monday. And once we got back, we had dinner with the Autreys. Arden and June Autrey are missionaries here and Arden is a Bible teacher (plus our teacher while we're here). They are incredible people (and made us some incredible food)! So yeah, that was our Monday! By the way, the coffee shop is not open on Mondays. They are open Tuesdays-Saturdays from 10:30-5:00. Kind of nice having Monday off. =)

So Tuesdsay we had staff devotions at 9AM which went well. Then Kelly Curry, the founder of An Tobar Nua and Foundation in Christ ministries, wanted to talk to us about theologies and stuff. So we met for like an hour and a half and discussed the different theologies and what people believe and where in Scripture it is found. He talked a lot about the Catholics and what they believed too (since Galway is a highly Catholic town). It was actually really interesting and I learned a lot from it. After that, we just went and hung out in the cafe. I got talking to two girls and they had me sit down with them! It was really wonderful because I felt like I was starting to connect with the youth already! We talked about all sorts of things! Then, it was time for lunch and I ate in the cafe (which was incredible! had the best grilled cheese ever). We get one meal a day and we have a lot of great selections! Seriously, every one of you should come over to Galway, Ireland to have some scones and tea at this coffee shop, plus whatever other things they have there! Haha! Anyway, after lunch, we just hung out around here and relaxed. And then, since we didn't have much to do, we watched High School Musical! Ha! Good times! If you haven't seen it, you should watch it. So cute!

Anyway, then we got together today. We met with Susan (Kelly's wife) and she told us about how the ministry was started and where God has brought them over theyears. It really is phenomenal all that God has done in their lives! We had lunch again in the cafe and this time it was during the busy hour when all of the school kids come in. It was neat just sitting there and observing them (makes me glad I'm not in junior high and high school anymore). =) After lunch, we went next door to the bookstore that is owned by An Tobar Nua. They wanted us to start getting training because we will be helping out there as well. I am so excited about working there! I think it will be a lot of fun! We had a chance to help the woman who runs the shop with some little things here and there. It actually felt good to do some work and get things done. I think I'm just ready to get in on the action. =)

And now I'm here, sitting in my room, starving cause I haven't had dinner and it's already 9:17pm, which would be about 4:17pm your time. Personally, I am doing well and just ready to start work. I have been having some struggles since I got here, but I am trusting in the Lord and seeking His direction and strength in it all. God has just been incredible. I feel like I am growing little by little each day in my relationship with Him. It is still super tough with all the other things going on, BUT God is faithful! God is amazing! And I really believe He is becoming my everything. I can't make this life without Him. I can't make this trip without Him. I can't make this day without Him. He is my source of strength, my energy, and my guide! And in the hard and crazy times, I know He will always be with me. So I guess just please keep praying for me! Pray that I will get settled in and be prepared for the work ahead. Classes start next week and work in the coffee shop starts tomorrow. So please pray!! But God bless each one of you and I hope you are doing well! Please let me know what is going on in your lives! Give me updates!! My email is michelle_cravens@tayloru.edu if you ever want to email me or fill free to leave comments on my webpage or dropshots page or even snail mail (address is down below). I'd love to hear how you all are doing and know how I can be praying for you!! God bless and I will leave you with some verses from Psalms that have been encouraging to me over the past month!

"Yet I am always with you; you hold me by my right hand. You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will take me into glory. Whom have I in heaven but you? And earth has nothing I desire besdies you. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever....But as for me, it is good to be near God. I have made the Sovereign Lord my refuge; I will tell of all your good deeds." -Psalms 73:23-26,28

I love you all and thanks for your support and prayers!

~Michelle~

I'm Here! Yay!

2007-09-01T13:05:00.000-04:00

Hey all!! I just wanted you to know that I made it here safe and sound! Praise God!! Finally!! It seemed like it took forever to get here but now I'm just trying to get settled in. Yesterday was crazy. We went to the Chicago airport around 1:00 to check in. Aerlingus, the airline we flew with, only allows 80lbs total for your lugage. When I weighed it the day before, I had just barely made it. Well, I didn't realize that they only allowed a certain amount of weight for the carry on as well. I put my backpack up there and it was way over the weight limit. I was like oh no this is not good! So I started taking stuff out of my backpack and putting it into my larger bag. Still wasn't enough, so I took more stuff out. I was kinda panicking but just like please God help me! The lady was finally like, it's okay now put your other bags on here that your checking, so I did. I kept apologizing to her and tel her that I was goin to be gone for 3 months and was trying to do the best I could. When I had finally gotten both of my bags up there, she said that if I would have been one more ounce over, I would have had to pay a fine. One ounce you all! Seriously! That's crazy! God is so great. I know it seems like such a small thing but it was a small thing that I was worried about that God took care of! Thank you!!

Anyway, we finally got to Ireland around 9:15AM their time, which is 4:15 your time. We were definitely tired when we got here. Then my friend Brian King (famous Leinster rugby player) picked us up at the airport! I wasn't for sure if he would remember me but he did! It was so great to see him again and catch up and hear all about his family and just life! So he drove us to Galway, which is about a 3 1/2 hour drive from Dublin. It was nice....but we were all very sleepy! We finally got to Galway around 3 I think it was or maybe earlier and I got to see Leanna! I went to Ireland with her two years ago and she is here for a year long internship! I am so happy she is here!! She in incredible!

Anyway, we got into our room and it is huge! So much bigger than I thought. Six beds in all, three bunk beds. Lots of open space. We have our own bathroom and a lot of clothes space (which is always good for girls)!! Anyway, then we took a tour of the place. I hope I can remember everything and where everything is! It's like a maze! So crazy! I'm just glad to finally be here.

Please pray for me. Pray that I would be able to get settled in quick and figure everything out. Pray that me, Sarah, and CJ would all gel well together and work well with each other. I know God's got big plans for us over the next three months...just pray that we will continue the course and keep our eyes on Him! Thanks for all your prayers and I'll try to be back soon! Gotta go in to town now to pick up some stuff! Love you all!!

-Meesh

Leavin...On a Jet Plane!

2007-08-29T22:41:00.000-04:00

Oh my gosh! I can't believe it's already here! I am at Taylor right now, anxiously awaiting my flight to Ireland! Tomorrow we are leaving around 3 for Chicago, spending the night there, then heading for Ireland on Friday! We leave around 4:45pm! Oh my word, it's already here! I am super excited! I am trying to get everything done before I leave but I wanted to give you all my address in case anyone is interested. Here it is:

Michelle Cravens
An Tobar Nua
25-27 Lower Dominick Street
Galway, Ireland

Fill free to e-mail, leave comments on this blog or on my picture website, or snail mail me while I'm in Ireland! I'd love to hear from all of you! And please keep me in your prayers! I can't wait to start sharing my adventure with you all! God bless!

-Michelle =)

Summer's Almost Over =(

2007-08-20T02:00:00.000-04:00

I can't believe it! This summer has flown by so fast! This whole year has flown by so fast! It's crazy! Anyway, I just want to give everybody a head's up of what's going down in the next couple of weeks. I leave for Indiana this Friday or Saturday and will be up there for about a week to take a prep class. Then, on Friday the 31st, I leave for Ireland! We head out about 6:45pm and will probably get there about 3 in the morning our time. (however, it'd be about 7am their time!) And my luck, they will probably make us stay awake all day so we can get used to the time change. It sucks but it totally works cause that's what I did the last time I went to Ireland. Oh gosh, it was aweful, I'll never forget it! We got there and they were like no sleeping till like 6 or 7pm. And so to keep us awake they made us go on a scavenger hunt all over Dublin! I was so frustrated (and tired) but it actually was a good thing because I got to know my way around Dublin and figure out where everything was! Ha! But man, when I went to sleep that night, it was the best thing ever! I think all of us could have skipped dinner that night. We just wanted to sleep!

Ha, anyway, I'll be in Lexington for the rest of this week trying to pack up, see friends before I leave, and read a history book about Ireland! So much to do and so little time, but I'll get it done! Anyway, please just keep me in your prayers. Pray that God would continue preparing my heart for what He's going to teach me in Ireland and for the work He is doing over there. I want to find where God's heart is at and the work He's doing over there and partner with Him. It's going to be awesome!! Only 11 days away now!! AHHH!! Okay, I'll try to post again before I leave! Lots of love!

~Meeshie~

Holy Spirit Rain Down!

2007-08-05T14:00:00.000-04:00

"Lord Jesus, I am thirsty for the fullness of Your Holy Spirit. I present my body to You as a temple, and my members as instruments of righteousness, especially my tongue, the member I cannot tame. Fill me, I pray, and let Your Holy Spirit flow through my lips in rivers of praise and worship!" -In Jesus Name, AMEN!

Wow, God is GREAT! Things have been tough for me for the past couple of weeks, but God is working in my life. James and I are taking a break from our relationship. We both have so much to learn and so much for God to teach us both. We both just had a peace about it and feel like this is what the Lord wants us to do. So we are taking time apart. I don't know if it's God's will to be back together. I do hope we will be because he is my best friend and I love him and care for him very much, but I also want God's best for my life and for his. The best place for us to be is in the center of God's will and His plan for our lives. And if we're not in that, then we need to move to where God's at. However, that's not the easiest thing (even though it's the best). And as you can see from my previous post, God has been teaching me over and over again about trust. It's so hard, but so amazing when we finally do it.

Right now, I know I am where God wants me to be. He is refining me, shaping me, drawing me to Himself. And oh how sweet it is! I had been struggling a lot and the only place that seemed to bring comfort was in God's Word and in His presence. I really have just been trying to focus my time in on Him and seek His face. I want to come back to my first love, which is Jesus. I want to fall madly in love with Him so that He is all I need. It's been incredible to see how He really truly has been there and carried me every step of the way.

My pastor's been talking a lot about being baptized in the Holy Spirit and I just went up because I wanted it. I wanted more of Jesus and more of Him to fill and overflow my life. So I went and God just touched my heart. I went up for prayer at church and He just showed up! I am learning just to release and believe in faith. And it's incredible!! God's power flowing through me. His Holy Spirit over my life! I want Him to lead me where I'm to go and show me where He's working. I want more of it and more of God! It's like I'm in a whole new ball game, a deeper level with God. I have been learning so much and been realizing how important that personal time with the Lord really is. It's in the secret place with God where intimacy with Him comes. He meets us where we're at, loves us, comforts us, speaks to us. And He's always there! It's like this quote I found the other day, "God knows the rhythm of my spirit and knows my heart's thoughts. He is as close as breathing." -author unknown. Wow, isn't that incredible?!?! He is right there all the time, that close to us!! I really wish I could express to you in full on this blog what God is doing in my life but I can't. I just hope what little I can express will show you and encourage you of God's goodness and faithfulness. His promises really are true. It's not easy though, believe me. I still have very difficult times and ask why things have happened the way they have. I know I will probably continue to struggle but my goal is to continually keep my eyes on Jesus (that's something James always encouraged me to do while he was on the mission field). When my eyes are on Him, all is well and good because I am trusting Him. He is in control in the present and with the future! Praise God!!

Psalm 63:1-5
"O God, you are my God, earnestly I seek you; my soul thirsts for you, my body longs for you, in a dry and weary land where there is no water. I have seen you in the sanctuary and beheld your power and your glory. Because your love is better than life, my lips will glorify you. I will praise you as long as I live, and in your name I will lift up my hands. My soul will be satisfied as with the richest of foods; with singing lips my mouth will praise you."

Trust: Why is it So Hard?

2007-07-30T00:06:00.000-04:00

Sometimes trusting is the hardest thing ever to do. Ever since I've been home for the summer, I've been trying to really get my priorities straight, with God as the most important thing in my life. And it seems like just about every time I have been reading in my Bible, I have come across His promises that He will never leave us or forsake us. Seriously though, I will read in the Psalms and come across a verse that talks about how God is always there and will never leave us. And about every time that I find it, I underline it and make sure to write in that it's God's promise to us. Because when we know that He's always going to be there, then all we need to do it trust in Him. That is something He's been trying to teach me over the past month since I've been home. I need to just trust Him and let go. But it's so hard. I don't know why. I guess it's because I want to have control of every situation. I seem to feel so much better that way. When I have control, I seem to think I know what all is going on and I don't need to worry. But I really can't control anything and it just leaves me being even more anxious. I talked to Jennie tonight and she has struggled with the same stuff. She made a good statement and is so right: "It's bondage." But the freedom that comes from letting go of it is incredible because seriously, all we have to do is trust. So that's what I'm trying to work on right now. I just need to trust Jesus. His way is best. He always wants what's best for me and for everyone else. So I guess the question is why not trust Him? I just ask that you please keep me in your prayers right now. I'm struggling so much and just need God's direction in my life.

And by the way, a really good movie to watch is Diary of a Mad Black Woman (by Tyler Perry). It is incredible and I highly recommend it. I watched it for the 3rd time tonight and would really like to watch it again but I have to work in the morning. Maybe I'll watch it again tomorrow. It's just amazing. Incredible themes and story line! Okay, goodnight all! =)

"Praise be to the Lord, for he has heard my cry for mercy. The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and I am helped. My heart leaps for joy and I will give thanks to him in song. " -Psalm 28:6-7

Commisions, Weddings, and a Chicken, Broccoli, and Rice Casserole

2007-07-10T00:13:00.000-04:00

Well hello, it's been a while since I have written on here. Where to start. Let's see, I started working at Holifield Photography a few weeks ago. Things are going well, just staying busy making phone calls out to the high school seniors in my city. We are the official photographer of the 5 main public county schools for their yearbook pictures and are trying to get them to come in and do other sessions with us for their senior pics. So my boss wants us to call out and do a telemarketing type thing with them. We are offering 5 different types of sessions and we can earn commission on 4 of the 5 which is really nice but it's hard calling people and getting them to actually make an appointment and pay for it when you call. However, God is good. Last week, I called and scheduled this one appointment that gave me $15 in commission! I was very excited! I think that's the most anyone has gotten. It's still kind of a bummer though cause I've probably made close to 200 phone calls and haven't had very many schedule. Oh well, all is good. Just pray they'll call back later to make an appointment!

What else, oh this past weekend I went to Pennsylvania for a wedding! It was so beautiful! James' cousin got married and it was such a fun time! It went by way too fast though. Oh well, guess that's how things go. You can check out the pictures on my dropshots account.

And finally, this is the big event of the day...I made dinner today! I finally decided I just needed to do it. I am not a very good cook at all and really haven't made anything great in my life (I can do omelets and mac and cheese and sandwiches and quick things like that) but today I decided to make a casserole type dish. I found the recipe in a magazine and decided to go for it. It was a chicken, broccoli, and rice casserole. It came out okay until I took a scoop out and realized the chicken wasn't cooked all the way. Oops! So I put it in the microwave, zapped it for a bit, and then served it to my parents. It all ended up okay and actually tasted pretty good!! I was pretty proud of it! And I'm already thinking of ways I can improve it! Yay! So I made it through my first cooked meal! Haha!! Wish me luck cause hopefully I'll be trying some other things here soon!!

Well, that's all for now. Lots still going on....good things but just tired and need to go to bed. Need to get up early and get my homework done for my summer classes (I am so far behind, yikes!) And by the way, it is now July 10, 2007, which is me and James' one year anniversary!! Hard to believe it's already been that long!! Yay!! Time flies by so fast! =)

2007-06-18T14:55:00.000-04:00

Okay, well this is my very first blog post! I decided to set one up because I will be studying abroad in Ireland this fall and want to keep people up to date as to what's going on with me and my life. So I figured why not start now with a blog and get some practice in before I actually go! Now that I've got one, I guess I should write some interesting stuff. Haha, I don't really know what to say except for the fact that I'm back in Kentucky now and will hopefully work on unpacking all of my stuff and moving all my things back in over the next two days. Then I start work at Holifield Photography on Wednesday. Finally, I'll be earning some money! Okay well that's gonna be it for now. I need to get ready because my Dad and I are going to lunch! Maybe he'll take me to lunch on his motorcycle! Woohoo! =) Hasta luego amigos...