Trust: Why is it So Hard?

Sometimes trusting is the hardest thing ever to do. Ever since I've been home for the summer, I've been trying to really get my priorities straight, with God as the most important thing in my life. And it seems like just about every time I have been reading in my Bible, I have come across His promises that He will never leave us or forsake us. Seriously though, I will read in the Psalms and come across a verse that talks about how God is always there and will never leave us. And about every time that I find it, I underline it and make sure to write in that it's God's promise to us. Because when we know that He's always going to be there, then all we need to do it trust in Him. That is something He's been trying to teach me over the past month since I've been home. I need to just trust Him and let go. But it's so hard. I don't know why. I guess it's because I want to have control of every situation. I seem to feel so much better that way. When I have control, I seem to think I know what all is going on and I don't need to worry. But I really can't control anything and it just leaves me being even more anxious. I talked to Jennie tonight and she has struggled with the same stuff. She made a good statement and is so right: "It's bondage." But the freedom that comes from letting go of it is incredible because seriously, all we have to do is trust. So that's what I'm trying to work on right now. I just need to trust Jesus. His way is best. He always wants what's best for me and for everyone else. So I guess the question is why not trust Him? I just ask that you please keep me in your prayers right now. I'm struggling so much and just need God's direction in my life.

And by the way, a really good movie to watch is Diary of a Mad Black Woman (by Tyler Perry). It is incredible and I highly recommend it. I watched it for the 3rd time tonight and would really like to watch it again but I have to work in the morning. Maybe I'll watch it again tomorrow. It's just amazing. Incredible themes and story line! Okay, goodnight all! =)

"Praise be to the Lord, for he has heard my cry for mercy. The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and I am helped. My heart leaps for joy and I will give thanks to him in song. " -Psalm 28:6-7

Commisions, Weddings, and a Chicken, Broccoli, and Rice Casserole

Well hello, it's been a while since I have written on here. Where to start. Let's see, I started working at Holifield Photography a few weeks ago. Things are going well, just staying busy making phone calls out to the high school seniors in my city. We are the official photographer of the 5 main public county schools for their yearbook pictures and are trying to get them to come in and do other sessions with us for their senior pics. So my boss wants us to call out and do a telemarketing type thing with them. We are offering 5 different types of sessions and we can earn commission on 4 of the 5 which is really nice but it's hard calling people and getting them to actually make an appointment and pay for it when you call. However, God is good. Last week, I called and scheduled this one appointment that gave me $15 in commission! I was very excited! I think that's the most anyone has gotten. It's still kind of a bummer though cause I've probably made close to 200 phone calls and haven't had very many schedule. Oh well, all is good. Just pray they'll call back later to make an appointment!

What else, oh this past weekend I went to Pennsylvania for a wedding! It was so beautiful! James' cousin got married and it was such a fun time! It went by way too fast though. Oh well, guess that's how things go. You can check out the pictures on my dropshots account.


And finally, this is the big event of the day...I made dinner today! I finally decided I just needed to do it. I am not a very good cook at all and really haven't made anything great in my life (I can do omelets and mac and cheese and sandwiches and quick things like that) but today I decided to make a casserole type dish. I found the recipe in a magazine and decided to go for it. It was a chicken, broccoli, and rice casserole. It came out okay until I took a scoop out and realized the chicken wasn't cooked all the way. Oops! So I put it in the microwave, zapped it for a bit, and then served it to my parents. It all ended up okay and actually tasted pretty good!! I was pretty proud of it! And I'm already thinking of ways I can improve it! Yay! So I made it through my first cooked meal! Haha!! Wish me luck cause hopefully I'll be trying some other things here soon!!

Well, that's all for now. Lots still going on....good things but just tired and need to go to bed. Need to get up early and get my homework done for my summer classes (I am so far behind, yikes!) And by the way, it is now July 10, 2007, which is me and James' one year anniversary!! Hard to believe it's already been that long!! Yay!! Time flies by so fast! =)